Fill the Gaps - The Entitlement Trap

As I stepped carefully over puddles and half sidewalks, I could see the smiles coming from through doors and windows. Children came up to us. Parents waved as they held babies. Chickens, dogs, even cows at times roamed the streets, grazing through trash and mud. Barbed wire twisted around some houses, while other houses stood barely held together by sheets of scrap metal and cement blocks. I saw children laughing and playing as they flew plastic bag kites and pulled a milk carton car along the road. Some rolled bike tires down the hills, like it was the best thing ever. I used to ask why does everyone seem so happy here? Maybe it's a front or a face, but there is a genuine way of life that shows contentment as I walk through the village in the Dominican Republic. True, deep contentment. And I finally realized that entitlement is the factor. There is an epidemic of entitlement that runs rampant in America, even with the best of intentions.

Entitlement robs you of contentment. It doesn't take long if you are watching TV, listening to a radio, or walking through a store to realize that our culture and media urges us to think we "deserve" it. Even if you didn't want it before, you find yourself saying, "yeah...maybe I do deserve a (truck, vacation, new house, phone, etc.)" We fail to see what we have all of the sudden and realize we are more wealthy than much of the world we live in already.  Entitlement has you looking at what everyone else has, rather that what you have. Entitlement has you thinking you deserve when in reality we all deserve nothing. As Lecrae's song "Boasting" goes: "Tomorrow's never promised, but it is we swear. Think we're holding our own, just a fist full of air. God has never been obligated to give us life, if we fought for our rights, we'd be in hell tonight. Mere sinners owed nothing but a fierce hand. We never loved Him, we pushed away His pierced hands."

Entitlement says, "I deserve." We were created by an almighty God who can give us what we need when we need it. He gave us exactly what we need to live the best life now and the eternal life after this life, we only need to accept it. We entered this world with nothing, and we can take nothing out of it either. (1 Timothy 6:7)
"I don't deserve bad health."
"I deserve to be noticed."
"I deserve a raise."
"I deserve a better job."
"I deserve to be heard."
"I deserve to go first."
"My kid deserves the best."

We feed this mentality as a culture as soon as our kids are out of the womb. The truth is, our kids don't deserve everything, but sometimes they get everything. The truth is, we don't deserve bad health, but sometimes we're handed that card. We don't deserve anything but condemnation as we stumble around a perfect God. It's harsh, but it's truth. If we don't grasp it, we will be surprised indeed once we reach eternity.

Does this mean we beat ourselves up? Not at all. It means we stop expecting, and we start being grateful. As we continue to look to our model for this series, Ruth, we have seen how much she didn't expect, but showed complete gratitude to her mother in law and to Boaz. She came to this foreign land with Naomi, knowing full well she probably wouldn't have a future there, and started out working hard for her means, and for Naomi's means. She humbled herself to Boaz and showed gratitude for his favor. Ruth didn't expect a single thing. She found contentment.

Furthermore, Ruth's situation was one that anyone had the "right" to be discontented with. Widowed, no signs of a future, and forced to work harder to make a life. There is a good reason Naomi changed her name to Mara (meaning bitter), as Naomi displayed this emotion. And then when Boaz tells Ruth that she needs to wait for him to do the right thing and find a way to marry her legally. As exciting as this is, Ruth was content with this. Whether it worked out or not, she waited.

How do we get by entitlement and the sense of deserving everything in our time, and embrace contentment and gratitude?

Stop asking what people can do for you, and start asking what you can do for them. A huge part of realizing what you have is giving what you have to offer. God's perfect plan is worked into our gifts, talents, skills, resources. When we give, without expecting anything back, we find contentment indeed.

Count your blessings. Sure, your budget isn't as big as the Jones', but you can still get by. Your kids probably have toys that aren't only milk carton cars, but ones you step on every day. Maybe your health is terrible, but you still find joy in the small things that God places before you and you have a different appreciation for life because you know how precious each day is. You may feel like you have nothing, but you have people. You may believe no one is there, but God is, and if you've accepted His grace and gift, you have a gift that will never be taken away. There is always something to be thankful for, and if you can't find one, keep looking.

Let's change the norm in America and fill our gaps with Jesus, not with things we wish we had. Nothing will satisfy more than He.

Scripture to Read:
2 Kings 5:11, Philippians 2:3

Questions to Ponder:
How does entitlement cause us to completely miss seeing grace in our lives?
In 2 Kings we read about Naaman expecting to be healed. How does his attitude reflect one of entitlement and discontentment? What might he be missing in God's plan?
How does not expecting from others help you embrace contentment?

Fill the Gaps - The Process of Purity

I think many of us have been through that awkward talk with our parents or at youth group about purity. Our minds tend to go to sexual purity when we hear that word, but purity is so much more than that area of our being. It is even more than our morals and lack of sin. Purity comes from our whole being.

When we truly boil down the definition of purity, it helps to think about things we reach for that are pure, thus better for us or better quality. Pure honey, pure maple syrup, pure gold, pure essential oils...These things are more "whole" in what they actually are, meaning no additives. As we read Matthew 5:8, Jesus tells us, "blessed are the pure in heart for they will see God." This is a statement that should make us want to jump up and start deciding how to be "pure in heart".

As we carry on through our study of Ruth and how God blesses her in her faithfulness, we'll find a lady who is striving for purity, despite her background and her origin. As we read of the "intriguing" customs of her laying at Boaz's feet in the night, we will learn that this was an action of respect and endearment, not one of impurity. Ruth wanted to show her intentions, and as a result, she learn's that of Boaz's intentions, and together they see God shine through them in their character. (Ruth 3:1-15)

How do we strive to become pure in our being so that we may see God more and more?

Guard your heart. You have probably heard that passage out of Proverbs that says "above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it."  These words weren't just placed in the Bible for you to share on facebook in the pretty, curly writing over top of a sunset image. They were put there as an intentional warning that helps us seek purity in our lives. Guarding our hearts means guarding our very center of life. When we are vulnerable to the things of this world that are not helping our walks with Christ, we are slowly giving pieces of our values over, and leaving God in the dust, when in all honesty, you can't live without Him. This passage not only means to guard your heart, but heart means your mind, understanding, being, character, will, inclination, soul...

Stop listening to your "heart". I cringe every time I see people post something like "I'm listening to my heart, and it tells me to..." or "those other curly font, meme things that say "Follow Your Heart." I'm here to tell you to never, ever listen to or follow your heart. It is deceptive and based on emotions and feelings. (Jeremiah 17:9) If I let my daughter listen to her heart or how she is feeling, she'd be made up of spoiled preschooler with every sparkly unicorn, pink baby, and full of fruit snacks for every meal. If I listened to my heart most days, I wouldn't have any friends and I would be working from my couch. The heart and emotions are real, but stupid. They know nothing. They react on impulse and no common sense. Just don't.

Watch your "input" - it equals your "output". Hanging with people who swear all the time will probably get you swearing a lot. Watching movies that are suggestive will probably desensitize you to what is unacceptable in God's eyes and make it more socially acceptable in your eyes. Not reading your Bible each day will not provide you the reminder of hope and empowerment for the day that comes from God, but it will cause you to lean on other things. How can you share the hope of Christ is you neglect to put it in your own soul? Strive for pure things to put pure out.

Leave room for Jesus. We used to tell kids at camp who got a little too close to "leave room for Jesus". Not only is this applicable teens in their public displays of affections, but for marriages and life in general. Marriages will only thrive when they have Christ at the center. Hope in the midst of struggles is only found in relying on God. You can find excitement in the mundane because you can see God working even in the woes of Monday, because the pure in heart will see God. Remember to have God in every aspect of your life.

Purity is acquired in time, and God will grace us that purity, but we also need to do our part in allowing Him to do so. Start watching your thoughts towards others. Take a knee in humility in order to gain understanding. Strive to seek Him in every area.

Scripture to Read:
Ruth 3:1-15, Proverbs 4:23

Questions to Ponder:
What does "purity" mean to you?
How can you strive for purity in your wholeness this week?
What do you need to to do make sure you are filled with Christ and not just emotions of the heart?

Fill the Gap - Hopelessly Devoted

I just love seeing my youth group girls dance in their shows twice a year. You can see the dedication, the passion, the work they have put in all year to nail their twirls and forms. Without taking the time to practice or to really focus on what needs to be done, refining one's skill or passion is impossible. As with any sport, hobby, craft, you have to devote time to honing in on God so that you can become more and more in tune with Him, living life in His ways, and knowing the differences between His voice and that of the world.

To become devoted to something, it takes time and honesty. You have to address the habits that hold you back. You have to strive to discipline yourself to practice daily. In Deuteronomy 6:5, we are told to "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength." In Matthew 22:37 we are told similarly to "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind." It is easy to be so devoted to something that is in front of you, or that you will find rewards of this world in, but not so easy when you can't always feel God in front of you and know that that reward is far greater than any other you can get on earth.

Why is it important to become devoted to God? In a world that carries many different views from many different people, with many different opinions, we hear all sorts of "commentaries" on Who God is. Keeping in mind that God is the only One Who can tell us Who He truly is, it takes a relationship with Him - one that is more than attending church on Sunday mornings, or only on Easter and Christmas. To truly build relationship with someone, you spend time with them. To truly know the ins and outs of something, you get all up in it. Being devoted to God makes Him personal to you, no matter what someone else's portrayal is of Him.

Ruth's view of God was probably interesting, as she was from Moab, which didn't worship God. Her mother in law was bitter towards God. And her sister in law had gone back to worship her god. The only way Ruth could have learned Who God is, was to do what was right and getting to know Him up close and personal. Obviously Ruth had seen God in a real way and wanted to embrace Him as she did what she needed to in order to provide for her mother in law. Don't ever let humans crush your relationship with God - He is bigger than that. Don't ever let a circumstance crush your relationship with God - He is bigger than that. Don't ever walk through this life without Him - because you will fall, and you will need Him, whether you believe it or not.

So how do we devote ourselves to God? How do we fill the gap within us that we try to fill with merits of this world that only leave us wanting more? We strive to love Him, just as those above verses tell us to.

With all your heart. The heart is a symbol all throughout the Bible that represents the "center". The hub in which your life runs and desires are tick. Is He the center of everything you do? If you're married, dating, in love, make sure He is right there in the middle of it.

With all your soul. The Greek word for soul is "breath". The breath of life. We breathe in God's goodness and breathe out praises. I love the song "Great Are You Lord", as it says "It's Your breath in our lungs, so we pour out our praise, we pour out our praise..." That says it all. We wouldn't even be breathing and walking around this world without His hand.

With all your strength. With a force or great degree. Not that we force our beliefs on people, but we pursue God with everything and every ounce of energy we can muster.

With all your mind or might. Your understanding. Your way of thinking. Proverbs 3:5 tells us to "trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding." When you truly know God and have seen Him work, you will know that His ways are nothing like the plans in your head or the way you see this world. They will blow your mind.

Jeremiah 29:11 says, "for I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper and not harm you, plans for a future and hope." Sounds good, doesn't it? The problem is we usually stop here, thinking we'll be handed this promise, and we fail to read the very next verses that tell us that we need to give a little too. Jeremiah 11:12-14 continues with, "then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you,' declares the Lord..." 

Do your part in seeking Him. Don't wait for Him to just hand it to you. Show you are devoted and you want to be devoted. Work for what is going to matter the most at the end of this life. Don't dare take another step without Him.

Scripture to Read:
Ruth 2:12, Deuteronomy 6:5

Questions to Ponder:
How does Boaz's words speak highly of Ruth's devotion to God?
How can you personally find habits to get more devoted to God?
What happens in your life when you become devoted more and more to God than on the the opinions of the world?

Fill the Gap - Stop Waiting, Start Serving

I keep wanting to write a book. I have no idea what it would be about or what it would entail, but I know I want to...someday. I keep wanting to travel more. The list I have to visit is long, and expensive, but I know I want to go see places in this world that are beautiful. I hear this theme over and over again from people. They want to have kids but they want the right career first. They want to travel, but they want a spouse first. They want to serve in the church, but they want to find time first. Let me be the first person (or the 100th) to say that waiting isn't the answer. Life passes quickly, and if you don't follow through with God's prodding when it comes, you might miss it. We have a God of second chances, but not necessarily a God of second opportunities.

Ruth, having moved to Judah with her mother in law heeded an opportunity and stepped out in risk to see what kind of life God may have for her now, knowing full well that a husband may not be in that picture. But she chose a land where God was worshiped, not another god. We read a parable by Jesus in Matthew 25 about 3 servants who are given their master's wealth to keep safe while he is away. The first servant gets 5 bags of gold to be entrusted with and returns to his master 5 more bags when he returns. The second servant gets 2 bags of gold and returns 2 more for his master. And the final servant is entrusted with 1 bag and returns the same bag, gaining no more to his master. The master is infuriated with this servant, saying he did nothing to further his wealth. Jesus uses this parable to challenge us to use what we have to further His kingdom.

We can sit on our hands and wait for "the right moment" or we can get up now and go. We have all been given an ability, words, gifts, desires, goals for a reason. God wants us to stop waiting around for us to have more money, find Mr. or Mrs. Right, land the right career, find the time, and just jump. Consider the valuable bags of gold you have been given, whether in something as simple as a smile and warm welcoming spirit, to words just longing to seep out onto a page in a book. Now is the time. Sign up to volunteer. Write the book. Go on the trip.

We build our character best in Christ when we are actively participating in His work. In order to fill the gaps in your life and know what He is calling you to do, well...you have to do something. I used to fear doing things. I want to believe that this is why I never went away to college, but stuck around locally. It worked out and ultimately, God's plan happened here, but I often wonder what that life would have been like. I feared a new place. I feared people. I still fear people sometimes. I got to a point though, where I found myself at home in serving our students - Jr. and Sr. High ladies specifically. I found a love for playing guitar and joined the praise team - talk about a step for me! I tapped into my love of traveling and joined a mission team to the Dominican Republic and since have been tied there with connections and more trips. I was able to find my place in God's plan and find where I belonged, whether or not I had a man next to me. Eventually, obviously, the man came along, but not because I was pining alone in my bedroom for him. I made a life for Jesus first, allowing Him to show me the gifts He put in me and use them to find my place for His glory. If the man never would have come, nothing would have changed in my heart in terms of serving the Lord, but now I serve alongside my guy and we challenge each other to tap into those gifts.

Start living. Stop waiting. Find what you can do NOW to be an active participant in God's plan, desiring first to expand His kingdom before trying to fill the voids of your heart. A quote I love  by Reggie Joiner is the following:

"Don't wait until you feel like it to do something. Do something in order to feel like it."

Serving God will give you a whole new, enriched energy and sense of belonging in this world with purpose. A purpose that far exceeds anything we can cook up for ourselves! Ruth went after it. And we will get to see more of her story as we plug away at this series more. God blessed her for her faithfulness in mighty ways, and He wants to use you to do awesome things for His glory too! Just get over the gaps you feel and fill them with His plans for you.

Scripture to Read:
Ruth 2:1-3, Matthew 25:14-30

Questions to Ponder:
How did Ruth take a risk and serve God by taking care of her mother in law?
What are some things God has put on your heart to do? How do you know they are His desires?
What are you going to do in order to serve God and furthering His kingdom rather than waiting for "the right time"?

Fill the Gap

I recently saw this post by TobyMac. We can post these words all day ourselves because they sound good, but the fact of the matter is there is life-changing truth in these words if we fully embrace them and strive to apply them. As a woman who used to be a teenage and college-aged girl, I couldn't embrace or understand this for the longest time, and would wish for a man to come into my life to fill the gap, fully convinced I was sold out for God. The scary thing is that in the midst of my personal pining, I realized I wasn't even close to allowing God to have the reins of my life, especially in that area. One day, it clicked though for me. I remember wrapping up the study "Lady in Waiting" with some of my high school ladies and thinking about how I would be okay with or without a guy in my life. I'm not saying this is the "magic formula" but not much later my husband entered my life, and I didn't even think we were dating, but hanging out! That is how much I had clicked that switch off, and had found so much joy and peace, and satisfaction in Jesus. No one else entering my life could cause that kind of joy.  

But after a summer of fishing, baseball games, and just late-night faith talks, I knew this guy was the one. He was attracted to my faith, and I was so blown away by how much he challenged me to dive into God, not into him. That's what made it clear for me. He didn't provide the joy Jesus gave me, but he complimented it. He didn't "complete me", but he complimented my relationship with Jesus.

You see, we try to fit so many different people into a role that only God can fill. We are unfair to our friends, siblings, significant others, parents, loved ones, etc, because we expect them to fix the problems and the gaps that only God can fill and fix. We expect people to bring us a joy and a peace that only comes from God. So for the rest of February, I would like to take some time to consider what it looks like to allow God to fill the gap you think only a human can fill. Or the ones that you may be already trying to fill with a human.

I want to challenge you to give it all to God. This sounds like your basic, Sunday sermon here, but truly, right now, write down the things in your life that are frustrating to you at the moment. The things you can't let go of. Maybe it's finances. Maybe it's a career path you want to be on. Maybe it's finding a spouse. Whatever it is, let's find ways to let it go. Let's consider the things God can give us that those things or those people can't.

Consider Ruth for a moment with me. We read right off the bat that her, her mother in law, and her sister in law had all lost their husbands in a land and people frowned upon by God's people, Moab. Naomi's son's had married Moabite women, Orpah and Ruth, and as Naomi decides to return to Judah, to make amends with God in her homeland, she urges Ruth and Orpah to stay in Moab, as she has nothing else to offer them, and knows full well that Moabite women would have much difficulty creating a new life for themselves in Judah. Orpah goes home, but Ruth insists on going with her mother in law, risking her future at getting another husband, living in a new land that didn't accept her people, and serving a Good that wasn't that of her people. Ruth chose to take a risk. What do you need to let go of in order to allow God to come in and fill the gaps?

Another powerful example from the Bible is when the woman came, broke her alabaster jar for Jesus, and anointed His feet with the perfume. This box represented her future, for they were meant to be broken at the feet of a fiance/future husband, as well as her wealth, as it cost much money of the woman's family to give this as her dowry. This woman gave it up for Jesus, showing that He was her Hope and future.

So the question that remains as we look ahead to this series, is are you willing to sacrifice your plans to God, allowing Him to guide you where He would like you to go, despite where you would like to go? As we move along the next week or so we'll consider how we fill the gap of our hearts with Christ, and how we do that, based on Ruth's story.

Scripture to Read:
Ruth 1, Luke 7:36-50

Questions to Ponder:
What is something you want so badly?
How can you come to a place of knowing that only God can truly satisfy you?
What does it look like in your life for you to abandon everything you have/want to God? (Whether than means that you can't place expectations on your loved ones that only He can fill, etc.)

Agape Love - Envy Eats You

One thing that I have found very dangerous is social media. I think that this is the understatement of the century. Not only is it dangerous because of the way people use it to bully or get into cyber arguments, but I have found it to be the easiest way to start an envy craze in yourself. I have to admit that I love social media and how it connects us, as well as for the positive uses of it, but I do believe it feels like a giant brag box at times that causes envy and eye-rolling. I've fallen into the envy mode of someone's vacation, or living room. Right now especially, I am envious of people in warm places. 

Nothing will eat you up faster than envy, which is an obsessive type of jealousy. Even God is jealous of our hearts, but He is never envious. One of the literal meanings of envy in this context is "to exert oneself for". We use energy to envy, whether we realize it or not. In fact, it is a dangerous game if you are a leader in any capacity. You get stuck in the comparison trap and find yourself driving the people around you nuts, basing your budgets, time, energies, and mind all on the thing you're obsessed with acquiring, because the neighbor, other church, that employer, that friend, etc. has that better car, ministry, job, vacation plan, etc., than you have. It will eat you into obsession. We see how it drove Joseph's brothers crazy as they envied his status in their father's eyes. It became so bad that they sold their own brother into slavery and hurt their father by saying his son was killed by a wild animal. (Genesis 37)

There are many ways envy robs us of relationship and of showing love. Firstly, it keep us from feeling happy for someone. When we live in our own desires and comparisons of someone else, we tend to not like the person who has what we want. In fact, we despise them more when they get something nice, or when something goes right for them, meaning we definitely don't celebrate with them and for them. This is a relationship, team, even a faith, killer. We are so focused on what we don't have that that other person has, we begin to resent them and even resent God.

We also walk in the belief that life should be fair, when in reality, God never said life was fair, nor did Jesus teach this. Just look at the story of the workers in the vineyard. The landowner went out early in the morning to hire workers for his fields. He also hired some towards the end of the day, and they all got the same exact wage. While the early workers thought this wasn't fair, Jesus tells us in this story that those in the back will be brought to the front. (Matthew 20:1-16) We can't believe everyone should have the same amount because we'll go crazy keeping track. We need to believe that God has our best interest and knows what we need, when we need it. Trust Him and show you trust Him.

Envy will drive you insane. You will no longer be an effective part of ministry because you are so busy and obsessed with getting what you don't have. You'll no longer be able to see straight and see what is going on around you because you are so fixated on that thing. Saul gets so envious and obsessed with killing David, that he devotes his energies into finding him. (1 Samuel 18) What could you be possibly missing because you can't tear focus off of what you're obsessed about? Let go of those blinders and start being grateful for what God is doing in your life.

Conquering envy comes from living a life of gratitude and contentment. You can find these characters if you just stop to be thankful for the provisions and blessings you do have. What better way to reveal trust to the One who knows what you need better than anyone else. Consider what you have and why it's the best for you in this moment.

Scripture to Read:

Psalm 37:1-9

Questions to Ponder:

What are some things you catch yourself becoming envious of? 

According to Psalm 37, why is being envious pointless?

What can you do to conquer envy in your life specifically?

Defining Love - Types of Love

February in our culture is usually a mix of red hearts, glittery cards, and creepy cupids. This month can bring up all sorts of emotions, depending on who you are and how you view this Hallmark holiday. Some people eat up the roses and glitter, loving to feel the love, while others just absolutely hate the reminder of loneliness. I truly believe our world's view of love, however, is a little off of what God's view of love is. So, will you allow me to challenge you this month? Let's find ways to get around the loneliness or the glitter obsessions that hinges on people, and look to a never-changing, eternal kind of love that is far more valuable than any earthly relationship you will have.

The world has so many definitions for love today. It seems like one person has a definition of love that is completely different from the next person. It is sometimes messy, but it is also beautiful. I think we get too wrapped up in one type of love, especially if you're a girl, dreaming of prince charming and watched a lot of Disney or Hallmark movies. I don't think there are many ladies who wouldn't want a prince charming, and so many hit their heads over and over trying to find Mr. Right. But love is more than a prince charming or a perfect relationship. Even if we don't have those things, there is a love that is greater, stronger, and more permanent. There is a love that is playful. There is a love that is unconditional. Even though we can have our own definitions for what love is, the Bible gives us 4 types of love. The following are the Greek words, found in the New Testament, but examples are found throughout the whole Bible (the Old Testament was Hebrew).

Eros Love - Erotic love. A healthy form of love portrayed in Scripture to be exclusive to only a husband and wife. I think we misuse this love today, giving it away too openly and with anyone we could have feelings for. However, giving it to one person is a gift indeed. Call me old fashioned, but the comparison traps aren't a factor in this way, and the priorities are set straight. Most of the examples in scripture where "Eros" is used is talking about the boundaries of this love. 1 Corinthians 7:8-9 is one.

"Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good form them to stay unmarried, as I do. But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion."

Celebrate Eros with the one chosen for you, not just with anyone.


Storge Love - A natural drawing type of love, like a mother to her newborn. It is a type of love that takes place within a household or within a family. Lack of this love is a hardened heart. The times it is used in scripture is in the lack of it, such as in 2 Timothy 3:3, using the word "astorge", or lacking a natural affection.

"...they have no understanding, no fidelity, no love, no mercy."

A lack of natural love between a mother and her newborn would be crushing indeed. It is lacking happiness, mercy, understanding, as the passage states. There is work to do in a heart that can't experience this love, but there is work to do in any of these loves that are lacking.


Philia Love - A deep love in solid friendships. This love is one that we are called to have as a fellowship with other Christians.

John 13:35
"By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another."  

This type of love is full of fondness for another. Liking of another. Kindness towards another. It is a camaraderie and a team. This type of love is of most importance as it looks to the benefit of others. Philia love has the potential to draw others into that camaraderie if it is used well and right. There is an appeal to this love that makes others want it because of the way it takes care of others.


Agape Love - This is a love that only comes from abiding in Christ. Agape is rarely used outside of the Bible because it can only be described through Christ. We strive for this love because it is the love that Christ His Father and He has for us. Unconditional. Sacrificial. Philia and Agape are set apart when Jesus challenges Peter, asking if he loved Him, and though Peter replies yes, Jesus asks him the same question 2 more times. Peter didn't understand though because he pictured Philia love, not Agape love. Jesus was asking if Peter Agaped Him. (

Agape love is not shown through how we feel or what is deserved. It is through our actions, regardless if the person deserves it. John 3:16 is the greatest example of agape.

"For God so loved (agaped) the world, that He gave is only Son, that whoever believes in Him will not perish, but have eternal life."

The most powerful love we can have is that of Agape. Over the next several days, I want to look at how we can start defining Agape love through 1 Corinthians 13, where agape is defined practically.

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails."

Let's consider love this month in ways that are not of this world, but of our God.

Scripture to Read:
1 Corinthians 13, John 3:16, John 13:35

Questions to Ponder:
When you think of the word "love" what comes to mind for you?
Which one of these "loves" are you most familiar with?
How can you start to grasp Agape love?

Seek Like You Mean It!

There is nothing more irritating than when I have just sat down, with books, or computer on my lap, wrapped in my blanket and I hear, "mom, I can't find_______." (Fill in shoe, blanket, cup, toy, whatever here.) After much explaining of where I last saw the _______, I still hear the "I still can't find my_______." So I give it a good couple minutes for her to search more vigorously, even though she has convinced me that she has looked everywhere for her________, to which I finally dig out from my cozy blanket and unheap the piles of books/computer I have on my lap, working, and I get up, go up the stairs, and look in the exact spot I said the _______ was. OH! And it's there. Right in that spot my mind recalled. I swear I can recall the exact spot the baby kitty doll is, but for the life of me can't remember to send an email.

Now, I know that a baby doll isn't as crucial to find in life as Christ is. We are told to seek Him first and foremost, and this is because we need Him most. However, I do believe we tend to get distracted along the way. We see a toy we need, or a career path that looks appealing, or something that we desire so much. None of these things are bad, but we don't always stop to consider "is this what God wants for me?" We tend to make plans, execute plans on our own behalf, and glance up at God for a second to make sure He's good with what you're doing. Rather than seeking wholeheartedly for His direction, we go with what feels "good" or "right". Truth is, God's plan doesn't always feel "right" at first. I'm sure when Abraham was told to take his only son to the top of the mountain as a sacrifice, that plan didn't feel right either. (Genesis 22:1-19)

Jesus tells us to seek like we NEED Him. Like we absolutely can't live without Him, and we can't. The problem is, we try to fill our longings with other things in this world, when really the only thing that will fulfill that emptiness is God. We need to seek Him wholeheartedly, without distraction, like nothing else matters. Psalm 42:1-2 expresses this longing:

"As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for You, my God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When can I go and meet with God?"

What does your longing for God look like? Do you long to meet with Him, seeking Him like He is the only One Who can satisfy your thirst for eternity. I just love this passage because it is a reminder for us to be satisfied in Him, wondering when we can meet with Him again.

I'm sure many know the verse, Jeremiah 29:11, but what comes after that verses is everything:

"For I know the plans I have for you,' declare the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. You will seek Me and find Me when you seek Me with all your heart. I will be found by you," declares the Lord..."  - Jeremiah 29:11-14a

We can take comfort in the part about having hope and a future, but with it comes a call to seek the Lord and call upon Him. We are told if we seek Him with all our heart, He will be found. We can get so distracted trying to find Him in the midst of the clutters of life. He is like the lost shoe under the couch that we don't always think about until we absolutely need it, then we get distracted on the way to find Him. Strive to seek Him like you need Him all the time in every hour, minute, second.

In conclusion to our little series on Seeking and Finding, consider the things you are seeking truly. Do you set your plans and see how God fits into them, or do you seek God's plan and find your place in it? Seek humility and strive for unity because it is critical to our mission. Seek solitude in times of overwhelming life, so you can be drawn back to His care. Seek contentment when you feel like life isn't fair, and find gratitude and healing through in the midst of it. Seek relationships and open doors of opportunities to change not only someone else's life, but your own.

Scriptures to Read:
Jeremiah 29:11-13, Matthew 7:7-9, Psalm 42:1-2

Questions to Ponder:
Which one of the attributes we talked about do you want to strive to seek more and more in your life? (Humility, Contentment, Solitude, Relationships) How will you do this?
How will seeking God above all else be your foundation as you go about this challenge?
How is your longing for God? How can you be motivated to seek Him like you are vitally thirsty and can't live without Him?

Teachings of Jesus- Treasures

My daughter has a bag or box of different things she treasures. They can contain different items any given week, but those are the things that are usually dragged around the house, scattered all over the living room, and negotiated over as we make outings on whether or not she can bring them. Though these things change any given time, one thing has stuck with her as most prized since she was very little- her bright, soft butterfly-patterned blankie. It has been so loved, that we've sewn it multiple times, tried to wash out stains that remain, and driven across the county to retrieve it before a night of drama ensues. It is truly the one thing she can't go far without.

I think we all have something like the favored blankie. It can be anything in adult life that you can't let go of or have anxiety over thinking about losing or never having. Maybe you can't live without your status or title. Perhaps you think your life can't start without a significant other. Possibly money has a hold on you, or achievements, or the way people perceive you. Maybe it is something simple like a favorite dress, or shoes, some sort of big kid toy that you like to show off. Whatever it may be, know that Jesus has a different idea of what treasures are:

 “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." - Matthew 6:19-21

This passage could give you all sorts of feelings. Perhaps you are saddened by it, or angry with it, but I encourage you to take comfort in it. It is actually a passage that helps me realize that this world is not my goal, or my end all, nor can this world take away the one thing that is most valuable to me - my faith. That is a treasure stored in heaven that can't be stripped from me here on earth.

When we seek treasures of this earth, and strive to have every status, toy, dollar, experience, on our list, we will never be content. We will be aimlessly, hopelessly wandering around in this life, never fully happy. If we have those things we want, we can lose them in the blink of an eye. Nothing is for certain, except the things of heaven.

Jesus sums this up with  “For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."  It is easy to value the things around us - to take notice of what people have that we don't. Sometimes we can get so obsessed with getting the things we have that we forget the things that really matter. Don't get distracted by the things that won't make a difference in 100 years. Treasure things that won't go away and that will make differences for an eternity.

Scripture to Read:
Matthew 6:19-21; Matthew 19:16-22

Questions to Ponder:
What do you spend most of your time doing? Most of your money on? How do these things show where your treasures lie?
Why did Jesus tell the young, rich ruler to sell his possessions?
How can you personally work on storing up your treasures in heaven?

Day 125: Standing Up to Yourself

Day 125
Judges 6-8; 1 Corinthians 9

Whenever we go on a trip to the Dominican Republic for our missions outreach with a group, we always get the same questions from females: "Why can't I wear a tank top in the community?" "Why can't I wear a bikini?" Why do I have to wear a skirt to the church services?" Paul wrestles with the concept as why we "become all things to all people" in order to reach some for Christ. Today, we'll look at how Gideon found courage to carry out Christ's commands and Paul's words on why our own desires can actually become a distraction to those around you when trying to be a light for Christ.

Stand up to your desire to do it yourself. We once again see the Israelites have turned away from God, (I'm seeing a pattern here) and are once again crying out to Him. When they finally realize that they are in trouble once again because they have leaned on the side of their desires, rather than His, they do the right thing in crying out to God and God hears them. Are you too stubborn to cry out for help when you know you are in trouble? God is with you when you cry out to Him, and maybe this is against your selfish desire as well, but He wants to rescue you. You only need to seek Him.

Stand up to your desire to be the strongest. One thing I struggle with is always feeling weak. I am most definitely a Gideon, and feel looked down on because I am always the sick one, the weak one, the emotional one. It's a hard pill to swallow, but eventually you just come around and accept it, as Gideon had. Gideon had all sorts of excuses, but God had all sorts of power to match them. God uses the weak to move His mission. This is a common theme throughout the Bible, though it is not a common theme throughout the world. Be encouraged by Gideon's story and allow God to work mighty plans through you!

Stand up to your self-confidence. I think so many times we rely on how confident we are feeling in whether or not we are willing to stand up to a task. In reality, we need to be relying on God's confidence in us. God had Gideon do many things that were huge risks. Yet, Gideon did them and as a result, Israel able to see God's hand once again. Never rely on your own understanding, but on what God's understanding is of you  We read how Gideon did not stay confident in the Lord, even after his victories that were brought only by the Lord. He fell into the snare of reward and got too confident in himself, separating from God and making poor choices at the end of his life.

Stand up to what you think you deserve. Paul's words here are really gold here for a Christian that wants ultimate impact for Christ. Paul has a list of things that are "perks" in this world or as one who shares the gospel message, like marriage and financial support for sharing the gospel. Yet Paul says that though these things are not wrong as a Christian, he doesn't want them to hinder God's work through him. He sees his call to singleness as a way of taking advantage of the opportunities to move more for Christ. He doesn't suggest marriage is wrong, as other apostles were married, but that he was perfectly fine as a single man, working for Christ, because Christ is his first obligation, as He should be for married folks as well. Paul took a second job so the gospel could be shared for free to all. He wanted to stay above reproach and be an example of Christ without hindering others to seeing Him. Rather than wasting time worrying about a spouse or a living from God's work, he did what it took to stomp out worldly desires for God's desires.  "We would rather put up with anything than be an obstacle to the Good News about Christ." (vs. 12) Are you willing to put up with anything to move the Kingdom?

Stand up to your point of view. As Americans, I've seen so many instances of shock as to how other cultures behave or how they conduct themselves in certain situations. As I opened today's reading, I brought up how many question the dress code in the Dominican outreach trips we do. This is something that is hard to explain, but Paul does a stellar job of it here. To reach certain groups of people, you need to form a mutual respect. If the women in the Dominican Republic view Christians as being modest, than that is what we'll be. If our clothes are a distraction to those we have come to be examples of Jesus to, than we will not wear those revealing clothes, because we know that Christ is worth more than a bikini or a tank top. We will become whatever we need to become to not be a hindrance to Christ's work through our attitudes, our clothes, our actions, etc. That is why we don't allow those clothes. Paul will become all things to all people so that many can be brought to Christ without the distraction of his own point of view. This does not mean we are uncomfortable or that we change anything that changes the gospel, but we meet people where they are.

What desires and points of view are you gripping on to that can be a hindrance to others when trying to see Christ in you? Gideon was able to stand up to his weaknesses and accept God's power in his life so that God's work could be carried out. Paul tells us to be all things to all people so that we are not a hindrance to sharing the gospel. If we can't wear a tank top because it will be too distracting in a culture, than we won't wear it. The gospel is more important than our desires and our points of view. Consider your desires as way less than what God desires for you.

Day 123: Don't Be A Fool

Day 123

Psalm 52-54

I feel foolish a lot. Some days are more foolish than others for me. I tend to be awkward and introverted, and that tends to lead to some awkward conversations with people I don’t know well. However, we’ll read about the worst way to be foolish – foolish in our faith. We can be the wisest people in this world in everything else, yet we are completely foolish if we fail to boast in Christ and allow Him to be our vision and deliverance. Let’s check out how David documents the foolish people in his life.  

The foolish have selfish vision. They strive to tear others down so they can be built up. They are so busy looking at what they can gain, that they don’t see that pleasing God is the only way to ultimate happiness. They’ll betray and boast about it. However, we can be wise in putting our vision in God’s hands and trusting Him to give us the best plan of all. David knew God was on his side and he put his trust in Him, praising Him in all circumstances.

None of us are truly good, but those who know there is a good are smart indeed. Only fools believer there is no God, and go about trying to save themselves. You can know the smartest person in the world, but they are only smart by the world’s terms and this lifetime’s terms. They are eternally foolish and don’t consider the power that God has to save them. A foolish person will think they have it all together, only to find out that only God has their lives together. Don’t be a fool. Lay your life in the hands of your Savior.

We can withstand attacks from fools. God will deliver you from the words of those who think you are the fool. You can praise Him right now for the deliverance He will provide you in the future, because you know He will come for you. If you seek Him, you will find Him. If you cry out to Him, He will deliver you. Be smart in Who can ultimately deliver you from the worries of this world and remember His mercy and sovereignty in your life. No matter how much you are attacked by those who don’t fully understand the answer for your Hope, you have that Hope.

You can be the wisest person in this world, but still be the most foolish in God’s eyes. Don’t compromise your faith for your worldly wisdom. Because of God’s mercy and hope in your life, you can experience deliverance, peace, and great vision that comes only from placing your eyes on God. 

Day 122: Dangers of 'What If'

Day 122
Judges 1-3; 1 Corinthians 7

How often do you entertain an idea that starts out with "what if..."? The phrase in it of itself is not a bad one. In fact, you need to ask "what if" sometimes to set goals and dream. But saying "what if" in the mindset of falling into temptation and truly thinking the grass is greener elsewhere than with God is a dangerous road indeed. Another phrase that can stand as a dangerous one is "if only". We'll see the dangers, and even some benefits, of these phrases play out in today's reading.

As the Israelites continued to fight and try to drive out the other nations that were in the Promised Land after Joshua's death, we read that they weren't so successful anymore in totally driving out the people. The reason is unknown as to why they couldn't successfully drive them all out, but there could be many reasons - tired, would rather compromise than fight, didn't have a solid leader anymore, etc. The Lord was still with them, however, and they were able to live with the people rather than lose the battle completely. Not fully completing the work God leaves for you can be something that causes you to ask "what if" and say "if only." He intends good for you, yet you also need to work for it.

We see the generation of Joshua die out and the people growing up forget what God had done for their ancestors and begin to find other means of happiness outside of God. Speaking in terms of "if only" or "what if" can lead us down some dangerous roads. We can be like these people who forget what God has done for us in the past and start exploring more exciting ways to experience life. While those things may seem exciting at the time, they lead to devastating circumstances. Because of our "what if" we can fall into the trap of what this world says makes us happy and forget what truly makes us holy and ultimately happy.

Many people play the "if only" game when it comes to their relationship status. Paul devotes an entire chapter of 1 Corinthians on this. It is an issue for many now, as it was an issue then. His advice - stay single. As a married woman, I can say I am very happy God placed a husband in my life. However, there is this delusion that many young people (I'm guessing mostly women) don't see through until they are married. They think marriage will solve all of their problems, when in reality there comes a whole new slew of more complicated problems. This is fine and all, but if you marry before you realize only God can fulfill that loneliness, you are in for rocky road ahead in your marriage, and you'll be more miserable than you were when you were single.

The good news is if we fall into the "what if" trap, God will deliver us if we cry out to Him and turn away from the things we thought were better than Him. As promised in Deuteronomy, God comes back to the people when they cry out for deliverance. Despite us betraying Him and putting other things first, like a spouse, child, or other idols, we can give God His spot in our lives back, and He'll come open to us and give you grace. He delivered Israel through the judges He sent in Othniel and Ehud to get Israel back on track. Even though Israel continued to turn away, in the time of those judges, they were on the right track because those judges respected God. Keep God first, and all else will fall into place.

Beware of the traps that come with the "what if" and "if only" statements we make. Those are statements that cause us to be discontent, regretful, and questioning God's place in our lives. Put God first in your life and all else will fall into their spots. Even if you turn away and forget God's place in your life, He is there waiting for you to come back.

Day 120: When Emotions Fly

Day 120
Joshua 19-21; 1 Corinthians 5

Things seem so gray today, as we decide what is right and wrong. We do things because it feels good, or because our heart tells us to, or because we are so angry, emotions take over. Today, we'll read about how we need to stand up to our emotions and hearts sometimes and follow what is right in God's eyes.

Sometimes, we can get so angry at someone that we jump to conclusions about the situation before we hear the entire story. This is why cities of refuge were created. When someone does something offensive to us, whether it's something as serious as murdering a loved one, or standing on the wrong side of the political arena in someone's opinion, emotions tend to fly. Rants are posted on Facebook. People want revenge. They call names. It's messy in general if someone can't handle emotions. The same was true when someone accidentally killed someone in Old Testament times. In order for the person who accidentally killed someone to be protected, there were the cities of refuge they could hide out at until it was all settled.

Sometimes our hearts and minds tell us to seek revenge and hurt someone like they have hurt us. When people face judgment and need to state their case, it is important to create space for them to do that without someone talking over them or someone who is too on the warpath to listen. Sometimes it's time to back away and let the other side cool down. If it's an argument that you know you will never win, perhaps it's time to back away for good from that conversation and call it an area you don't agree on. Don't ever allow emotions to get in the way of common sense. Emotions will get you into trouble. Your heart and it's "feelings" will get you into trouble, whether those feelings are good or bad. Listen to the guidance of the Holy Spirit and rely on God's leading - not yours.

1 Corinthians today talks about a different viewpoint of emotions and allowing them to rule you over God's ruling. We walk through this world thinking we deserve it. We deserve to find love with that person, no matter how moral it is. We deserve to be "happy". We deserve what our heart wants right now, no matter how against it God speaks on it. Then we twist His words to say it the way we want it said so we are fulfilled and not ridden with guilt. "Since God loves me, He means to say..." We put ourselves ahead of God because we think this world will fall apart without those things we want, that person we want, that lifestyle WE want. But the God who created you and knows your heart and what can fulfill it is shoved out for what you think you need. This is a harsh topic - I get it. We can twist words all we want to make it fit our life.

Paul is quite clear here. If a person living in sin has no intention of turning, they need to be removed from the protection of the church. They are still welcome in the church, but their sin will not be endorsed, no matter how "right" they think it is. As harsh as this idea sounds, it's in the Word. God wants all to ultimately come to Him. A church family is not to applaud the sin and accept the open-mindedness, then pat themselves on the back for being so accepting. They are to be loving, but not supportive of the sin. We are to encourage each other to live with pure lives, repenting for the sake of our eternity with Christ and living in a testimony to the power He has in our lives. We are not to come to church, living the way WE want, by OUR rules, not seeing anything wrong with it, and insisting we get a say in how the church is run. We need to see our need for a Savior. We can claim we WANT Him in our lives, but we need to also recognize our NEED for Him in it, and strive daily to put Him there.

The other side of the coin here is we need to be open to the correction of trusted friends in our church family. Don't deny the sin in your life, then call others judgmental when they lovingly try to steer you. God is the ultimate judge, and your friends will warn you, but God can make that final call and surely will. Be open, humble and in tune with God's direction - not yours.

Don't ever follow your heart or emotions. Those tend to cover your ears, your judgment, and your eyes to God's Word. Don't twist His Word to fit your heart. Do the hard things of making necessary changes in your life so that God is put at the front of your decisions - not your feelings. This is hard and harsh, but remember what is possible with the power of God.

Day 110: The Chaos of Disobedience

Day 110
Deuteronomy 28-29; Mark 13

The readings for today may feel like jumping into the scene of a horror movie. We see the consequences of not following God and His commands, and the blessings of following Him and His commands. We also see what it means to be His follower as this world continues on and gets closer to His coming back. Hold on to Him and the hope of His promise to you.

At first, reading the section in Deuteronomy may make you wonder how a loving God can do such things to a group of people. The sad thing, however, is when we disobey Him, we fall into our own consequences. God knows what will happen if you follow other gods, or put something ahead of Him, or get into a relationship we should stay away from, or act on selfishness. He warns us of what will happen, yet we do it anyways. We disobey and then we blame God for the horrible things that happen to us. At this point, we need to stop, take inventory of our lives and how it matches up with what God wants us to do - which is put Him first.

I think it is a common occurrence to push our boundaries. We are a lot like toddlers. We want something, so we start to inch closer to it, until it becomes something "we just do", or something "everyone is doing anyways". We forget Who we belong to, and fall into the arms of the world, rather than a God Who created us and has unfailing love for us. As parents, you warn your kids what will happen if they stay out too late, touch the stove, fail to complete chores, etc. Yet kids who disobey get angry at their parents because they think it's unfair. The truth of the matter is as parents, you want your kid to grow up responsible, safe, independent, respectful, and most importantly putting God ahead of everything else. We do the same thing to God Who wants the same for us. Yet when we disobey, we fall into the consequences of being reckless, dangerous, dependent, disrespectful, and the worst of all, apart from God.

If you have experienced misery before, or if you are right now, consider a few things. How is God using it to grow you? Is there an area of your life you need to give over to Him? Are you serving Him wholeheartedly with your life? Remember that God doesn't cause these bad things, but He'll allow them to refine you and to make you stronger in Him. He'll allow them because He has given us freewill, and because of that freewill, we will probably cause our own pain at times, or someone else's freewill cause you pain at times. We read in chapter 29 that that we shouldn't ever think we're safe, just because we know the warnings, but follow our own stubborn hearts anyways. We are still pursuing something other than God, and for that God will have no pardon. However, we don't always know why bad things happen, we also read in chapter 29, "the Lord has secrets known to no one. We are not accountable for them, but we and our children are accountable forever for all that He has revealed to us..." Stay alert, stay informed, and stay close to your God so you don't fall into the chaos of disobedience.

As the second coming of Christ draws nearer, we will experience hardships throughout the world. We are warned as followers numerous times throughout this chapter to "watch out" and to "be on your guard". To truly be alert, you need to know what Christ looks like, sounds like, feels like, etc. Without ever opening your Bible and knowing Him, and recognizing His role in your life, how will you ever know His voice? There will be deception, persecution, and misery. Be assured that God is in control, if you are His people. His people will be rescued and will be taken home. Don't lose heart in the midst of these miseries, for we read in John 16:33 “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” Do you trust that? More importantly, are you willing to live that out?


There is no doubt that in this world, we will experience some miseries. Much of it comes from direct disobedience from God, as we pursue our own freewill and desires more than Him and His desires for us, despite the warnings He lays out for us in His Word. Other instances are because of other people exercising their freewill and their actions ripple through your life too. Some, we'll never know the answer to until we can ask Him. Just stay alert, stay informed in His Word, and stay close to God so you can continue to grow through those hardships and be changed by His unfailing love.