Fill the Gaps - The Entitlement Trap

As I stepped carefully over puddles and half sidewalks, I could see the smiles coming from through doors and windows. Children came up to us. Parents waved as they held babies. Chickens, dogs, even cows at times roamed the streets, grazing through trash and mud. Barbed wire twisted around some houses, while other houses stood barely held together by sheets of scrap metal and cement blocks. I saw children laughing and playing as they flew plastic bag kites and pulled a milk carton car along the road. Some rolled bike tires down the hills, like it was the best thing ever. I used to ask why does everyone seem so happy here? Maybe it's a front or a face, but there is a genuine way of life that shows contentment as I walk through the village in the Dominican Republic. True, deep contentment. And I finally realized that entitlement is the factor. There is an epidemic of entitlement that runs rampant in America, even with the best of intentions.

Entitlement robs you of contentment. It doesn't take long if you are watching TV, listening to a radio, or walking through a store to realize that our culture and media urges us to think we "deserve" it. Even if you didn't want it before, you find yourself saying, "yeah...maybe I do deserve a (truck, vacation, new house, phone, etc.)" We fail to see what we have all of the sudden and realize we are more wealthy than much of the world we live in already.  Entitlement has you looking at what everyone else has, rather that what you have. Entitlement has you thinking you deserve when in reality we all deserve nothing. As Lecrae's song "Boasting" goes: "Tomorrow's never promised, but it is we swear. Think we're holding our own, just a fist full of air. God has never been obligated to give us life, if we fought for our rights, we'd be in hell tonight. Mere sinners owed nothing but a fierce hand. We never loved Him, we pushed away His pierced hands."

Entitlement says, "I deserve." We were created by an almighty God who can give us what we need when we need it. He gave us exactly what we need to live the best life now and the eternal life after this life, we only need to accept it. We entered this world with nothing, and we can take nothing out of it either. (1 Timothy 6:7)
"I don't deserve bad health."
"I deserve to be noticed."
"I deserve a raise."
"I deserve a better job."
"I deserve to be heard."
"I deserve to go first."
"My kid deserves the best."

We feed this mentality as a culture as soon as our kids are out of the womb. The truth is, our kids don't deserve everything, but sometimes they get everything. The truth is, we don't deserve bad health, but sometimes we're handed that card. We don't deserve anything but condemnation as we stumble around a perfect God. It's harsh, but it's truth. If we don't grasp it, we will be surprised indeed once we reach eternity.

Does this mean we beat ourselves up? Not at all. It means we stop expecting, and we start being grateful. As we continue to look to our model for this series, Ruth, we have seen how much she didn't expect, but showed complete gratitude to her mother in law and to Boaz. She came to this foreign land with Naomi, knowing full well she probably wouldn't have a future there, and started out working hard for her means, and for Naomi's means. She humbled herself to Boaz and showed gratitude for his favor. Ruth didn't expect a single thing. She found contentment.

Furthermore, Ruth's situation was one that anyone had the "right" to be discontented with. Widowed, no signs of a future, and forced to work harder to make a life. There is a good reason Naomi changed her name to Mara (meaning bitter), as Naomi displayed this emotion. And then when Boaz tells Ruth that she needs to wait for him to do the right thing and find a way to marry her legally. As exciting as this is, Ruth was content with this. Whether it worked out or not, she waited.

How do we get by entitlement and the sense of deserving everything in our time, and embrace contentment and gratitude?

Stop asking what people can do for you, and start asking what you can do for them. A huge part of realizing what you have is giving what you have to offer. God's perfect plan is worked into our gifts, talents, skills, resources. When we give, without expecting anything back, we find contentment indeed.

Count your blessings. Sure, your budget isn't as big as the Jones', but you can still get by. Your kids probably have toys that aren't only milk carton cars, but ones you step on every day. Maybe your health is terrible, but you still find joy in the small things that God places before you and you have a different appreciation for life because you know how precious each day is. You may feel like you have nothing, but you have people. You may believe no one is there, but God is, and if you've accepted His grace and gift, you have a gift that will never be taken away. There is always something to be thankful for, and if you can't find one, keep looking.

Let's change the norm in America and fill our gaps with Jesus, not with things we wish we had. Nothing will satisfy more than He.

Scripture to Read:
2 Kings 5:11, Philippians 2:3

Questions to Ponder:
How does entitlement cause us to completely miss seeing grace in our lives?
In 2 Kings we read about Naaman expecting to be healed. How does his attitude reflect one of entitlement and discontentment? What might he be missing in God's plan?
How does not expecting from others help you embrace contentment?